The World's Oldest Profession

So I was hanging out downtown last night, and I noticed a ubiquitous phenomenon. With the exception of a handful of guy-girl tandems, everyone else was rolling in crew of four or more of the same sex. This sounds familiar to you, I'm sure. Perhaps you're even used to going around like this. I know I am (nullus?). The logic here is simple: that there is some type of superposition of social talents that occurs when you are in a group. Unfortunately, contrary to what you learned in second grade math, five twos don't make a ten, in this case. They just make five times the excessive makeup, five times the overkill of perfume or fragrance, and five times the annoying, drunken conversation. Can you feel where I'm coming from?

As it goes, however, the more common group dynamic is a pack of guys or a gaggle of girls all following the command of one alpha. I guess the thought behind it is that they will experience some of the glory of their ringleader through the trickle down effect. I like to call these followers "weed carriers", (occasionally, for girls, it's funnier to use "wig handler").

This gentleman claims to have invented the term "weed carrier" sometime during the early part of this decade, but it is a concept as old as time. If you've read at all about this sort of thing, you know that even Jesus Christ had twelve weed carriers. The terminology, however, comes from the notion of a celebrity who needs people in his entourage to carry the weed on their person, so that, should there be any trouble with the law, this more-or-less worthless individual takes the fall. The central concept, however, is the idea of people of lesser worth flocking around a perceived superior individual. This might be due to looks, popularity, intellegence, fame, or any other measurable quality.

Weed carriers/wig handlers and weed owners are very situational roles; chances are you've played both at different points. But if you're carrying: are you really content to scrape the remains of the bowl after your weed owner is finished smoking? And if you're playing ther owner: be aware that your team is only as strong as its weakest link.

Useful Links:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Weed+Carrier
http://www.unkut.com/weed/

This post is dedicated to the Mizzle, my good friend and faithful WC.